Me and October

SO TRUE, you will never know what is going to happen for the next second or minute. Even if you are asleep or you are sitting at the toilet bowl in the toilet. Some unexpected things will just appears and caught your attention, this happened to me for the past two days. I am glad and I would tell I've made myself occupied enough to not even have time to iron my clothes and read my favourite books or even catch up with my dear friends. Uncertainty, it have not ever disappears from my mind even a second. I can't imagine what and where I will be the next day ,month or next year.

Nonetheless, I am happy for my decision to further my career in Singapore soon and pathetic to tell there is really no reason I should doubt my decision. I am sorry. I regret for once in my life had make ''tracking'' to someone who I think I can't afford to lost it and Cherish like a gold, lost my opportunities which I can actually step early in to a foreign country.Lastly, I am blinded and thing just don't goes my way like I though it will be. Many people who know me, clearly knowing I am a explorer who love to travel and looking forward to move out from my house. I am such an ASS. I got so many hundred millions reason to stay back but I think is best for me to leave, not only for my own good to become stronger , more independently and mature . Some way, is better for my family as well. I'm sure , we will be closer every each time I came back later. =S

NEVER is a strong word, she told. Yeah, I agree. Even if you ask me to think twice or million times I will still stick with the same bloody answer. Once I had made a decision, I shouldn't look back. Should I tell I'm stubborn or just being selfish? Hrmp, let you decide and let me know.Thank you to my family and friends who support my decision and the moral support from you all had never fail to allow me to do what I like. Yet, till now,I tears in the middle night. I felt I'm blessed. Thanks GOD. Life is up and down as I always told. Whether you can take it and handle it well or not, choice is yours. You choose the right one, yeah you are right. If you choose the wrong one, you just like a piece of glass, need to be fix with SUPER glue. There goes your SUPER glue is all the lucky, love and blessed from others who care and never give up on you, family and friends.Don't give up , no matter how long it takes, you will find your way and one day when you look back and you'll just realise ,you had grown up.

Long story short bah... Other that busy with working like an octopus , I am glad that I make it for my colleague wedding at Tapah yet first time in my life had drove 180km to a unfamiliar places and also attend the an Indian's wedding. Feel like 1Malaysia. haha! Lame. I wish I can attend my good friend Ezzaty's wedding next year which I can't make it for her engagement this year because it crash with my Grandfather 83's birthday. All the relatives and cousin will be around, and as a ''tradision'' Chinese family. Grandchildren shouldn't escape it.There is not many year left for us family to gather like this. I don't want to make any regret anymore.

This year I didn't make any wishes on my birthday because though I did for last 2 year, I went through a sad year wei... WTH. What I can do for these moment, do all the best I can and please the important people who involved in my life. =)
Can't wait for November to come, I will busy occupied myself with work and plan as my cousin and relative is coming. Till then, I'll update myself again.

- Chocolate -

He look so adorable yet innocent after I showered him, my lovely smart boy.

WITH LOVES

Hello again blog, I've put blogging aside since the last post and have been wondering when will I update the blog. I do not like to give excuses but the truth is, I had a very busy weekend and day due to my working schedule, and important tasks that I want to be completed. This period of time isn't easy for me as I tried my best to be physically strong and hope that my body can cope with my mental stress. Friends who know me well, will say that I am a workaholic. I feel sorry for myself. :(

My life has changed so drastically since last year. Couldn't imagine its going to be a year after since the day it started. Today, I view thing differently, as least I think I became stronger , love myself more. Just put it this way , I am no longer so innocent as I use to be. Till today, I see people by my own eyes and will never change my perspective unless I been convince and given prove. Isn't this a little change in
me?

I am blessed. At least when I am down and depressed, I have good friends around me who volunteer their pair of ears and give me their opinions and advices. I'm 22 years and 4 day old, should I convince myself to accept the fact that time has flown really fast that whenever I look back, I will think, "oh, so damn fast!"

I'm pleased that I have family and friends who care and love me. There's nothing more that I can ask for. I know what should be prioritised at this moment and I pray hard that life will bring me more challenges and that I will have the strength to improve myself through the obstacles that I am about to face. Thank you to all of you, and I promise that I will try my best to make you guys proud of me. It's been awhile since I've not posted any picture of mine. Why not share it?!

# Chocolate mint Ice cream cake from Baskin Robin

*Thank you Nisa and beloved Charmaine for this cake,card and flowers. -Hugs-

# Thank you Stephen , Jin tat and especially Andy . : )

# Love my girlfriends so much!

Alvina,Wendy,Stephenie and Gwynne

#Having so much fun spending surprise dinner with them at Daeroe Korea BBQ!

Thank you guys!!!

# Again , another surprise from them after 12 midnight~

I feel so touch and I do not know how to put my word into sentences, it is an unexpected surprise.

# Combination of white and sweet pink roses from somebody who don't like to be revealed. :)

I really love and appreciate the efforts and thoughts you've made.I hope you know.

# The shipping is finally here after 1 month plus! Thanks Erik Moh! Muaks!!

A late birthday present from London and I thought I need to wait for another month.. hehe

#Edwin's Tay

You have no idea, you had impressed me that you never fail to wish me every single year when you started knowing me. Really appreciate the friendship between us! =)

Before I end this post , just wanted to add-on for people who wish me on call, messages,wall . I had a simple dinner yet warm dinner with my beloved family .Thank you very much! T.T
p/s: I also receive a warm gift from Angele , and I promise will take good care of myself. =)

Loves,

Michelle -xoxo-

Turning Point

  The day started with a morning buzz from the phone and I realised someone had left for an interview. So, I left a message and went to the toilet and stoned for awhile till my soul came back to me. I changed and picked up the car keys and went to the nearby hypermarket as planned. Surprise surprise, only one of the coffee shops was opened and there were a few people in uniforms who walked slowly towards the escalator. With my morning mood, I walked like a snail towards the main entrance as the shutter was slowly rising. Yes, I was the first customer of the day. The staff was polite and greeted me. I paid for the groceries and got home by 10.15 a.m., the whole trip took me about 45 minutes.
  Then I spent some time chatting with her and finally did some housework since coming back from a holiday. Time passed really fast as I wished and I noticed that I have not been blogging since the 26th of September. I questioned myself, "What did I do after the last post?" I have been to and back from a short holiday, continued on with my crazy working life with tonnes of workload, I've been going through a period of emotional ups and downs and was challenged both physically and mentally.
  With regard to my family, my dear brother has recently got back from the UK where he studied and his Europe trip. He has been busy with his plans and life challenges too. Recently, his friend passed away due to leukemia and he has been quite upset about it. Somehow, I'm glad that he has such a gentle and polite girlfriend who is support of him. Also, my baby has grown healthy and smarter, and still very much loyal towards me even though I have been busy with my own activities. Dad has been flying in and out of the country due to his job and my mom had confessed to me that I'm such an ass and a terrible daughter who does not open up to my family. Yeah, I will not give her the reason that its due to my childhood life. What is the past is the past. Nonetheless, she knew that I went through a phase of mental depression and advised me to consult a psychologist if I think I am unable to handle my emotions. I do know that my family cares about me and therefore I expect nothing of them eversince I started my career and working towards my own goals. The only thing I hope from both my parents is that they do not worry about me. So, enough about family, back to myself.

  At 12 noon, I had cleaned my room, tidied my books, washed the air-conditioner filter, took out the trash and swept the floor. I received a call from a non-familiar number. So I answered the call with a question mark in my head. Finally, it is the call that I have been waiting for so long. My license has finally been approved by the Singapore Nursing Board and they want me to start work in November. I was like WTH, I was stunned and my mind went blank. After the brief call ended, I continued to arrange things in my room and went for a shower. I was surprised at my response which was chilled and calm.
  I am so tired to even think of anything due to the lack of sleep and carbohydrate. I have not been eating well these days. There is so much uncertainty and dilemmas in my mind, such as the future planning and the feeling of sadness of leaving my dear family, friends and home country. Till then, I will update after some of my queries are answered.